flickr crazy

I love my new camera. Check out my flickr page. I'm pretty proud of my "return to where I used to go as a kid and its all fucked up now" pictures. Cause they communicate how i felt. I was in complete shock that this nice little park I used to ride my bike to is completely decimated. And nature is slowing swallowing it up. I should have walked around more, tried to get a picture of the pool. But I was really shaken by it.

I went to the Terminal fundraiser show tonight solo. It was OK. I really hope they stay afloat. But as I told the guy behind the site, if I like what you're doing then most of Birmingham probably does not. At some point you have to appeal to the masses, not the 20 people who are at Bottletree every time I go.

I saw some people I knew at Bottletree, but the whole night felt hollow to me. I felt like I was going through the motions- stepping outside my fragile little circle again and observing people like I was watching a nature doc.

Sometimes I do things and I don't fully understand why. I guess going to Bottletree was one of them. The safe bet was hanging with Phil and Wendy and then going to Chad's. But I chose to go alone to a show full of people I barely know. I either have to stop doing that sort of thing, or stop wondering why I do it.

It's not that I had a bad time, it was just odd. This whole week, month, year has been odd. And I'm not sure why.